new dawn fades is objectively the best joy division song, what do you mean you prefer love will tear us apart. you’re wrong.
my third (and hopefully final) package from japan came in and the trinket page has finally been updated, featuring new charms and buttons. all that's left is to scan the stickers. hopefully i'll get around to them soon, for all you sticker lovers out there.
i have a deep love of trinkets. i have a strong, greedy desire to acquire nice things but don't have room in my life for a lot. too much of anything makes me anxious, i'd rather only have things i can put in a small box and take with me wherever i go. this is unlikely to change anytime soon. i feel a constant longing to be somewhere else, not a thirst for adventure, quite the opposite. i dream of a place where everything feels right, where i could be content to stay still and to rest. i dream of getting some nice furniture, tableware and a whole library when i find a permanent home, but for now i'll have my trinkets.
30.03.2025 | html & self reliance
my last college assignment was making a portfolio site. i chose to code it. i used brackets as usual and then published it with github. i think i was the only one who coded my website while everyone else used things like wix, which is obviously smarter and saves time but i wanted to challenge myself. it took a shitload of time but i didn't want to rely on any specific website builders because wix can literally stop existing at any moment and then all my work would be lost without a way to transfer it to a different site. it would be a commitment and i hate those. it would be a lost opportunity to build up actually transferable and universally useful html skills. it's great that these platforms exist and make life easier for people who don't want to learn coding but honestly i'm put off by their marketing of "wow! you don't need to know html to make your own super special website! so easy!" i think it being so widespread demonstrates a kind of learned helplessness about my generation and i do take pride in breaking the stereotype.
in the last 3 months i went from not being able to write a single line of javascript to still not being able to write a single line of javascript yet somehow making 2 websites. i'm pretty happy about it. my only experience with html/css before this year was copy & pasting code to customize my toyhouse page (and that one other time i tried making a neocities site, an epic fail). it's pretty exciting how i could now customize my toyhouse independently if i wished. it seemed so daunting and complicated before.
i haven't used toyhouse in years because it makes me feel a bit childish, like i'm playing with dolls, but hey, i love my characters and i ought to be proud to show them. maybe i will link my toyhouse profile here at some point!